Arrogant Worms

i think i'm obsessed with this canadian comedy band. been staking out their website and reading all about them (they have 10 successful albums already! and they blog too!). their lyrics are brilliantly simple and funny, and their songs just make you wanna sing out loud in chorus. haha.

I am cow, hear me moo
I weigh twice as much as you
And I look good on the barbecue
Yogurt, curd, cream cheese and butter’s
Made from liquid from my udders
I am cow, I am cow, hear me moo (moo)

I am cow, eating grass
Methane gas comes out my ass
And out my muzzle when I belch
Oh, the ozone layer is thinner
From the outcome of my dinner
I am cow, I am cow, I’ve got gas

I am cow, here I stand
Far and wide upon this land
And I am living everywhere
From b.c. to newfoundland
You can squeeze my teats by hand
I am cow, I am cow, I am cow
I am cow, I am cow, I am cow!

- I am cow!!!

those who want a sample of their songs feel free to icq me. you won't regret this! and i've added their links to my page too.

okie enough about them.

i've got an ens presentation on friday and i'm already getting the jitters. the funny thing about me is that contrary to what most of you think (if you people even bother anyway), i actually suck at making presentations, especially when school work's related. yup, it's true. i deliver just about the worst presentations anyone can think of. even william hung's better. my palms would start to moist, my mind plummets into a blank abyss, and my mouth clams up like an oyster. why? erm...um...ah...erm...uh...dunno. still trying to figure that one out. some might have heard of those saleman-rumours still circulating hall that i've actually sold ice cubes to eskimos before, BUT throw me in front of a classroom with a prof looking on and i'll show you an award-winning performance of sam the clam and his amazing closing act!

how bad am i? well the last presentation i ever made in ntu was back in my 2nd year for a comm skills assignment (i got a shitty c for that). it was a nightmare. 5 minutes never felt that long before. i was looking so nervously at my handnotes so often that my tutor had to prompt me to look at the class when i spoke. boo hoo. while i pointed at the tranparency, my hand was trembling so bad no one could tell what i was really pointing at, and it didn't help that the projector magnified my trembling by a bajillion times on the screen. boo hoo. so much for confidence. i think that class of mpe students never looked at me the same way again. so much for my 5 minutes of fame. at least i didn't pee in my pants.

i've managed to siam/avoid every other presentation opportunity eversince (maybe the rumours about me spread real fast), till this semester for my ens module, where everyone's gotta do a presentation at least once. least i'm only doing it once. argh. engineering students shouldn't be made to make presentations. i can't explain why, but they shouldn't. presentations should be restricted to business students, cs students, william hung wannabes and household plants. people like us have got alot more important things to think and take care of than to speak to a crowded room of idiots who're just glad they're not that idiot speaking up in front. okie. i'm in denial. argh.

c'mon, we're all really lousy at something right?

meanwhile i've just finished meeting with my beloved presentation groupmates who have chucked me the honour of delivering the conclusion to our whole project despite my vehement protests -

me:what?!you want ME to end it on an inspiring note?! i can't.
them:wah lao your engrand so powderful
me:really i can't. you don't know me. i know i can't.
them:*together* dun bruff lah, so powderful still want to siam right...
me:no no! i really really can't do this
them:wah lao eh we prepare the slides for u lor, dun humji lah sure okie wan
me:....
them:steady pom pee pee lah
me:....
them:cmon lah ho say lah, we all count on you leh
me:....
me:fine i give up, friday cock up don't blame me
them:wun wan lah, you shurly zhai wan, shurly
me:....

and so friday is d-day. haiz.

okie its time to get back to work.

Work Hard Day

okie today i shall officially begin attempting to work hard. i hope i dunt fail. haha.

the weekend's been pretty fine for me.

saturday's chelsea-wolves game was a roller-coaster though. went to buy 5 and 6 goals for the game prior to the match. then caught it with jinde at some chic cafe at east coast. first half ends 1-1, i think to myself 3 more goals might not come that easy for chelski. second half wolves take a surprising lead, 1-2. i get hopeful that chelski's gonna turn it on. they do, lampard equalises quite quickly and suddenly there's hope that winning big might be a reality. then enter jimmy floyd. scores a screamer a few minutes after coming on. i turn into a screamer. "money!" i was screaming like an idiot. but i think the majority of the crowd there were chelski fans so it seemed okie. my main man jimmy plops in a second. good god i'm hysterical now, a $5 bet yields a $50 return. i scream somemore. life is good for these few minutes of your life when shite like this happens. now i'm scared. no more goals please! tak boleh! wolves hold on really tight and the final minutes almost made me pee in my pants. then stoopid jimmy scores a fluke (its should've been offside!) in the bloody 93rd-minute, possibly with the last kick of the game. argh!!!! my world crumbles. i scold jimmy. i scold his mother. i scold his mother's mother. and then some. argh. i pull a long face and whine and howl. final score: 5-2 to chelski. dog shite.

had a really good chat with ma n pa yesterday night. they sent me back to hall (really nice of them after ma noticed what a sick puppy i was), but on the way we went to extension for supper/dinner. talked to pa about how he achieved what he had achieved today. his nutshell of a story lasted the whole trip to extension. but was an interesting and inspirational story nonetheless. then i reflected to both of them about my fears that i have no direction in my life at this moment. i dunno what i wanna do, and i dunno where to start and how to start. i 'm graduating in 2 months and not knowing what i wanted to work towards in the short term made me feel a tad useless. i knew what i wanted in the long term, but the journey there i really had no clue of...

anyway he offered some really good soothing advice. he offered options in terms of direction. and best of all he offered hope. and lots of it at that. i mean sure i read inspirational self-help books or listened to motivational speeches and blah, but honestly if you'd ask me, there's really nothing more inspirational than to hear them all from someone you're really close to and you look up so admirably to. by the time we were done with our talk, the kopitiam was starting to close liaoz. well so i hope i won't forget what he says, and try to get my degree first as an immediate concern.

thanks ma and pa.

celebrated steven's birthday last night during half-time of the man u-arsenal match. joe's right. i've never seen any poor sod sing a birthday song to himself before. poor steven. i dunno how he allows himself to be degraded so much. then again maybe that's why we all love him to bits. happy birthday dude.

okie okie time to get down to work liaoz. else people are gonna start nagging about how lazy i am.

Nuahster II

this is the third day in a row that i've not done any work for my fyp/ens/malay/any academic liaoz. terrible. better start by erm...monday?

anyway nuahed the whole of today away. spent most of it sleeping, dunno why i've been so tired lately. might be falling sick. legs ache like hell from yesterday's run. went back home only in the evening.

attempted to explain soccer's offside rule to val.

gave up on my first attempt. i dunno what's wrong with girls and football. it's been lidat all my life when i try to explain it to the clueless gender. girls in general can't understand the offside rule no matter how hard guys try to explain. i've seen grown men sweat over not being able to get through to their female counterparts over that silly rule. its the same as girls not understanding what's so entertaining about 23 men running themselves silly all around a field chasing one silly ball.

trying to explain the rule is like explaining to kids where they came from, there's the initial erms and umms (as you try to think of an easy way to get out of it) then you make one feeble attempt without getting too complicated, they look lost, and then you give up and quickly change the topic(wow! that car/girl/dress/fish looks damn chio hor?!) hoping they stop asking why lidat, but then why lidat #2 and followed by why lidat #3. tough.

then again maybe i'm just lousy at explaining stuff.

well to the clueless who REALLY wanna know the offside rule, click here. .

Knees Hurt Like Crap

just back from a super duper long jog with fitness-freak lincoln. it's a miracle i survived. we ran 179+199, took about half and hour. fitness-freak says its quite fast. it's a miracle i survived. now my knees hurt like crap. fitness-freak says its cos i don't wear sneakers with shock absorbers. it's a miracle i survived. my aquasocs have soles that're too thin so the impact of my every step ends up in my knees. darn. the only other surprising thing is that we actually talked non-stop throughout our jog. though i think fitness-freak talked more...haha. fun jog nonetheless.

Seabiscuit

just watched the movie which i downloaded from joe. heart-warming and inspirational film based of the true story of an undersized depression-era racehorse whose victories lifted not only the spirits of the three-man team behind it but also those of the nation as well. very entertaining.

okie. motivated to continue with work liao.

Nuahster

still no mood to do any work today. i woke early to go to school to meet my ens project mates. had wanted to stay in school to plough through my endless fyp/ens presentation but i think i lost the mood after i had duck porridge for lunch in can a. had this bloody strong urge to come back and nuah.

back in my room now with no mood to do anything. probably will just nuah around for the rest of today, tend to my fish tank or something, then i might find some mugging inspiration somewhere along the way.

went for a therapeutic swim with joe last night and no, we didn't get caught. swim was very good, i think we spent more time rubbishing about lotsa things under the sky than swim. somehow the water was really warm and yet i found myself shivering alot. weird. i swam 10 laps of the breath i think. was hardly a workout, but still better than nothing.

Now MY Legs Are Wet

lim choon seng just came to talk to me just now. talked about building a gym in what is now the meeting room. bloody hell he tied his dog sam outside my room and sam was lying all over my slippers and i had no idea. knn, so after mr longwinded-winded-winded left and towed that bitch away i walked out and the moment i put on my slippers i knew something was wrong. i don't htink it was pee since there wasn't a puddle, but it was still wet nonetheless... so i had to go wash my legs. and thats why my legs are wet.

village bicycle

does anyone know what a village bicycle is? haha.

anyway we just had a huge feast at extension. myself mark leon lincoln guoxin and zix. 2 whole chickens, 1 vegetable dish, 1 egg dish, 3 char kway teows and 2 bowls of rice each. one bloody huge feast alright.

nuahed the whole of today. no work done. did my laundry and vacuumed my floor. packed up my messy room.

last night's mambo trip wasn't very specacular. alot of dirnks (abit too much perhaps). alot of people were damn bloody high, chun, steven, hongwei, xiuwen...haiz jialatz. anyway its really probably the last trip till after the exams lah, really need to lay off partying for awhile liaoz. gives me alot of headache and heartache.

must get down to doing work tommorrow.

Total Recall

just came down to the com lab to cool down. the fluids mechanics lab is getting hotter and hotter especially when they have to off the fans to accomodate the wind tunnel projects. shoot. feeling quite bubbly this sunny afternoon. and looking forward to mambo tonight! according to john this is our last cheong session #4 liaoz. hopefully we'll stick to it being our last, else no one's gonna be able to study for the coming exams. mark john and joe have already begun studying liaoz, so envious, done with their fyps while us poor mpe folk are still slogging over it, right thomas?

woke up with a slight headache from last night's drinking session. think we all (besides the sipper) drank abit too much last night. hope it wouldn't affect those of us who're partying tonight. anyway just to elaborate more about the things that happened last night...

we met around 6+ to take a bus together to extension for mark's celebratory dinner. went to the BEST kopitiam, the one nearest to 7-11, the zhi cha there to eat. at least we had alot of cock to talk about while deciding what to order from the menus.

speaking of menus, me the hamsum idiot went to approach this really young nubile thing (i swear she looked like a m'sian ah lian working there) and asked "auntie ah, you mei you cai dan?" (auntie, do you have menus?) then wah lao she suddenly looked like she freaked out or something, and gave me a funny squealed up face before backing off and signalling that, erm she was also waiting for her dabao zhi cha food to be ready. shite. should've called her xiaojie instead. wah sibeh embarassing. ironically i was laughing like an idiot after i realised my mistake and decided to call this super-old ah mmm (whom CONFIRM works there this time) xiaojie. i think that totally made her day man. "you! you! zhe bian (moves to take menus), bu yong ke qi hor!" was her super-prompt enthu reply.

the rest of the dinner went by quite okie. chun joined us around 7, just as we started eating. i was trying to stall for time to wait for her but everyone was hungry, so bopianz. still, we were nice enough to order more vegetables since she likes veggies. so dun say dun have.

then we decided to buy beer, and the rest of what happened can be read in john's and joe's blogs. joe's blog about our lost-boy thomas is particularly insightful as to how lost in his doodling world that boy can be. lying on the floor, legs innocently waving about in the air and face in full concentration (you can almost see abit of tongue sticking out like a smart kid knowing what he's doing) while he took his time to doodle a stooopid sotong on mark's card like a kid in a drawing competition...

wah lao not say i wanna say lah but mark also damn bloody insensitive lor. whole bloody world in guoxin's room whispering and giggling in a little corner, he should have sensed we were trying to do something for his birthday lor. but nooo, mr kaypoh must barge into the room and peek around and even when joe and chun were trying to distract him away by leaving the room he still must find out what's going on...

and thats how mr kaypoh saw the lost boy draw his sotong.

sing birthday song next. no big deal, quickly got over with it. gave him his pressie which we didn't know what it was (chun bought it). so we asked him to open it. it was a shirt and a dumb lamb, mark are you gonna hug THAT to sleep every night? least the shirt looked presentably nice.

then we cut cake next. mark the royal majesty gets waited on while john struggles with the cake (must be a first time for him), mark takes his slice (the first piece) and stealthily fades off into my room (i noticed he had tried his pressie shirt on, so now he looks like a punk) to watch tv. everyone else gasps. everyone else sighs. everyone else proceeds to eat cake outside my room. everyone else cleans up cakey mess.

so it was beer guzzling time! nothing much lah. we played cai quan and 007 to get ourselves to drink. as you can see from everyone else's blogs, mark the cheat/sipper took like 3 hours to finish one can of beer. i think his beer was already beginning to grow mouldy. zix joined in the fun. zix the poor sod is new to 007 level 3 onwards where you play the normal game but cannot speak in chinese or english. i thought cannot speak chinese was already bad enough for him.

well that was our eventful night last night. hope mark the cheating sipper enjoyed himself. sure beer sucks, but you're supposed to drink ANYTHING and EVERYTHING people give you on your birthday (does not apply to my birthday though)!!!

time to get back to my fyp. haiz so slow. realised ens presentation is next friday. phew! got more time to prepare. gotta start speaking in malay liaoz. next wednesday is malay oral. malay people are ALWAYS into oral shit. dumb cikgu sibeh enthu. probably expect us to do the drama mamma rubbish he's always trying to advocate. dog shite.

happy birthday markie boy

today's mark's birthday. we celebrated for him by taking him out to extension for dinner and then buying beer back to drink ourselves silly. even bought him a nice little pressie and card. there were chun joe john tsen yeow guoxin mark and myself eating. drinking included zix. was quite a joyous affair, hopefully mark enjoyed it as much as the rest of us. kudos to lichun for initiating all this even though she didn't join in our drinking session. between us we downed 18 cans of beer. wow.

happy day. can't think of much to blog. happy anyway.